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Sin City
This is my kind o’ flick no doubt ‘bout it. The title says it all: Sin City. Jethro and me went and seen this at the local Cineplex. When we got there I saw that intern we hired…Tommy, Timmy or whatever his name is. I called out a few times like “Hey, college boy!” and even called him a fat-faced puke but all he did was look right at me and then act like he didn’t see me. Well, I’ll show him when he comes into work next week…
Anyway, we got into the movie and had out our popcorn and a couple of XTRA large cokes. See the large cokes is necessary when you are planning to get tore up – you drink down a couple of gulps and then add your flask of Wild Turkey to the mix and Volia! You have instant movie magic.
Movie got started and right from the start there was Bruce Willis. I’ve loved him (not in a man love kinda way) ever since DieHard, which is the best exploding building movie ever made. Whatdya know, he buys it tryin’ to save this little girl. That sucked, but the next scene had this huge guy – Harv – gettin’ with this gorgeous girl. She was naked and he was gettin’ down, but the next mornin’ he woke up and she was dead.
Movie was going great an I guess we got a little loud cause right when Frodo gets eaten by the wolf, this theater flunky comes over and shines a flashlight right in our eyes telling us we gotta leave. I told that little puke if he didn’t get the light outta my eyes I was gonna shove it down his pie hole. So he turns around and leaves.
A few minutes later, just as these whores were about to shoot it out with some guys in the movie, this rent-a-cop shows up and tells us he is going to make us leave.
Well I wasn’t really understanding or followin’ what was happening in the movie at this point, but I looked around the theater and noticed that most everyone had already left and everybody else was just starin’ at us. Well Jethro wasn’t havin’ any of this jerk’s guff and he jumps up an’ - well, that boy is BIG, he could’ve walked on the NFL as a linebacker if he hadn’t hurt his back. I was about to let him trash this puke, but then I thought better of it – I didn’t think NC would take too kindly to us getting’ banned from the movies on account of us tearing their security guards to pieces. So I says ‘Sorry’ to the cop and haul Jethro outta there.
On account of this movie’s excellent cinematography filmin’ of the titties and use of nice fire arms and grenades it get’s my unequivocal seal of approval.
5 out of 5 severed heads and a ’79 Ford Pinto ‘cause it was that explosive.
Brief Review:
5 out of 5 severed heads and a ’79 Ford Pinto ‘cause it was that explosive.